Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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