don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I love you. Go after that dick
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
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