I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
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