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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.

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• (786): View more from Florida

  And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.

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• (719): View more from Colorado

  Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".

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• (253): View more from Washington

  i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down

  (253): View more from Washington

  ppsyche im wasted where are you

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex

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• (626): View more from California

  obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set

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• (218): View more from Minnesota

  She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.

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• (236): View more from

  I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.

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