If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
