Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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