Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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