you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
