Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Randomize
