i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
