She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
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