Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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