i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
