this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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