if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I need water and some morals
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
