we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
