i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
