it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
