The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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