Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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