I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
