Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
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