I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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