Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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