After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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