i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Randomize
