I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on a dog bed..
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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