I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize