Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.

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  (586): I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face. http://tfl.nu/07yz
  Replies (3) Good night (2702) Bad night (662) Order T-Shirt
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  (905): View more from Toronto

  I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone

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  (905): I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone http://tfl.nu/ci8g
  Replies (23) Good night (855) Bad night (3319) Order T-Shirt
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.

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  (602): no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself. http://tfl.nu/5qf3
  Replies (2) Good night (744) Bad night (3671) Order T-Shirt
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  (979): View more from Texas

  I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME

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  (979): I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME http://tfl.nu/ljwk
  Replies (35) Good night (913) Bad night (4270) Order T-Shirt
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?

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  (702): As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation? http://tfl.nu/6nb1
  Replies (16) Good night (6997) Bad night (1102) Order T-Shirt
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.

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  (520): She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist. http://tfl.nu/mma2
  Replies (35) Good night (4370) Bad night (1136)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic

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  (202): I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic http://tfl.nu/pd64
  Replies (12) Good night (1271) Bad night (4231) Order T-Shirt
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  (415): View more from California

  And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!

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  (415): And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?! http://tfl.nu/ikec
  Replies (9) Good night (2841) Bad night (711) Order T-Shirt
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.

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  (902): hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help. http://tfl.nu/mkef
  Replies (5) Good night (1378) Bad night (3037) Order T-Shirt
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.

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  (614): And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts. http://tfl.nu/c0eu
  Replies (5) Good night (949) Bad night (2307) Order T-Shirt
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.

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  (250): well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves. http://tfl.nu/btjv
  Replies (13) Good night (1226) Bad night (1899)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip

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  (410): You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip http://tfl.nu/bjin
  Replies (4) Good night (1683) Bad night (395) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing

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  (775): I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing http://tfl.nu/nqjl
  Replies (6) Good night (956) Bad night (385) Order T-Shirt
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Denial, avoidance and beer.

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  (312): Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013. (312): Denial, avoidance and beer. http://tfl.nu/o423
  Replies (3) Good night (860) Bad night (235)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  My vag hurts but I feel vindicated

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  That is an interesting emotion combo

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  (609): My vag hurts but I feel vindicated (832): That is an interesting emotion combo http://tfl.nu/j6ty
  Replies (1) Good night (509) Bad night (184)

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