I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
