I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize
