I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
