his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
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