I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
