i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
