I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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