Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(610): View more from Pennsylvania

just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...

Fav 47 1796 5807
share tweet
(314): View more from Missouri

I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.

Fav 19 958 5858
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(415): View more from California

The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.

Fav 20 4252 930
share tweet
(910): View more from North Carolina

Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.

Fav 10 934 4605
share tweet
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(832): View more from Houston, Texas

I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..

Fav 28 5739 1671
share tweet
(778): View more from British Columbia

you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that

Fav 6 1259 3149
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(917): View more from New York City

No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.

Fav 2 2018 1072
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(406): View more from Montana

Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.

Fav 0 552 758
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(603): View more from New Hampshire

She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm

Fav 1 73 116
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT