Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a