hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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