I hate your face
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Randomize