I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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