I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Randomize