I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
