his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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