come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
handjob tips. give me some.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
