I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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