You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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