Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
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