can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
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