Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Randomize