The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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