She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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