Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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