how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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