ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
